Just when you have in the back of your mind that you are indeed an awesome, crafty and overall just spectacular mother because you’ve actually planned a
day of fun outside of the apartment instead of staying “physically fit” by playing an interactive Wii game (which totally counts as an outdoor activity
when it’s over 100 outside), God brings you back down to where you once again
belong…AKA reality, and I am confronted with another Mom Fail. *sigh.
Enter Museum #2- The Fire Safety Museum.
It’s Earthquake week and I had been totally jacked up about
visiting this museum. I mean, this place simulates natural disasters and how a
person needs to handle and maneuver their way through them. Outstanding and
Educational. What could possible go wrong..Right?!?!?!? Right!
Clearly sharing my excitement, Wyatt and I cab over to
aforementioned museum and the lobby greets us with cool old fire trucks and a
friendly Taiwanese guide who speaks pretty much 0 English. No biggie.
Right?!?!?!? Right!
He brings Wyatt and I up to our first simulated disaster.
Fire. Yes! This is going to be awesome!!!! I am putting all these exclamations
into my sentences so you can feel the enthusiasm that I was trying to breathe
into Wyatt throughout this experience. Why? Because in my gut, my mom gut,
(where you just know the outcome of stuff, but then ignore it, because of
overriding selfish desires and the belief that you must have indigestion), I
knew that this was going to be an epic fail.
Soooooo- Fire- Yes! We watched the video first. It was a
lighthearted film of how smoke inhalation is the leading killer and how you’re
supposed to crouch down really low on the floor and stuff if you want to live. So naturally the
first simulated experience was a narrow hallway filled with what appeared to be
smoke but what I’m pretty sure was a fog machine?! I DID know it was not real
smoke. (Mom Win!)
C’mon Wyatt!!! Why are you not on your hands and knees with
mom crawling through this super creepy hallway filled with fake smoke?????
Um, maybe because he just watched that video where everyone
about died and he’s 6?
Crap. Worst mom ever.
C’mon Wyatt!!!! (The door is closed…we need to get out…..)
he’s not budging - he’s no fool. Yeah, so I basically carried him out, though I was having some anxiety about not crawling since I knew that's what we were supposed to be doing, all while the
poor tour guide is pointing to the arrows near the floorboard showing us the
exit. We dutifully followed the arrows
out and he pointed to the stairwell. The man kept trying to go through the tour and let’s just say things did not get better
from this point on. Upon entering the earthquake floor I knew we were dunzo. Capital D.
My son's terror aside, I was kind of disappointed and will definitely be returning
by myself to complete the tour. I found it fascinating really. Wyatt said that
perhaps when he’s 7 or 8 he’ll be able to handle this museum. I'm glad he knows himself well enough to figure out when he can mentally and emotionally handle it, since clearly I can't. The tour guide was exceptionally gracious and gave us 3
safety DVD’s, 1 of which was a cartoon that they showed before our early
departure. I wasn’t sure how Wyatt was going to like it, but ironically he’s
completely comfortable watching a cartoon man pass out from carbon monoxide
poisoning and a cartoon family of 4 be schooled by Doo-Doo the elephant on how to make their home safe from electrical fires and earthquakes.
NOW I have my very own Doo-Doo (read into that sentence as you
may……) telling me how to make OUR home safe. (i.e. don’t bundle those cords
mom! Don’t put that exhaust fan on! Are those outlets dusty?!) And for that I
am oh so grateful. SOOO…mom win? Mom fail? Yes and Yes.
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