Top 10

Top 10 for October 2017

How you know its "been a day"

10.You've brewed a pot, drank a pot and are brewing another. The first child is not at school yet. 

9. Child wakes up screaming, refuses pants, refuses shoes and obviously a jacket in 33 degree weather is out of the question too. You put him in the car for school anyway. 

8. Child takes of shoes that were finally put on and proceeds to throw them at your head....

7. .....along with juice

6. 2 coffee kombuchas are consumed...because that's not really coffee right?

5. Child cannot buckle himself in, becomes irate and proceeds to throw more items at moms head in car. Where is all this stuff coming from???

4. Child falls asleep in car 10 minutes before swim lesson which we are 7 min late for. 

3. Double shot over ice doesn't seem to be kicking in.

2. Fearful I may have a coffee problem.

1. You change into your pajamas to find a peanut lodged under your boob.You did not eat nuts today. 

Top 10 for July 2017

Why we should all start oiling and calm the crap down.

10.They're not voodoo. They're from plants. Yup. Promise. 

9. They're not witchcraft. They're from plants. Yup. Promise 

8. They work.

7. They help my mood.

6. They enhance my food.

5. They chill out my kids.

4. I make cool stuff with all this natural plant juice.

3. I get to keep Dr.'s copays because there are less Doctor visits. I know. Doesn't that suck?

2. More energy. 

1. I earn a paycheck. Yup. Awesomeness.

Top 10 for July 2013

Why we should all drink coffee instead of water- What "they" say Water will do for you and my rebuttal of why Coffee will do the same.

10.“Water helps you lose weight”- Provided you don’t drink decaf, um, caffeine will have you bouncing around. Done. Weight lost.

9.“Keeps you looking young”- How old do we all look without coffee in the morning? Yes. We retain our youth with that nectar.

8.“ Water helps constipation”- Really people? Do I need to go there.? We know what coffee does. And yeah, I guess it’s a benefit.

7.”Water=Headache solution”- I’m not even sure why I’m still explaining myself. I can’t even TELL you the Ragers I have with no joe. NOT pretty. And no. This is not an indication of addiction.

6.”Water helps with sickness”- something about staying hydrated? Blah blah blah. Do you know I read that coffee may lower the risk of depression in women? DUH! Totally could have told you I’m way less depressed with coffee. Yup. And PS. Without my all day cups of coffee- I’m sick.

5.”Water restores energy and helps you feel fresh”- Look. I’ll go to 10, but I’m thinking I made my point right? I don’t need scientific facts for this one either- proof is in the mirror and in the attitude- With coffee I’m restored and fresh! End story!

4.“Water helps in preventing bladder and colon cancer”-There is evidence that coffee helps stave off basal cell cancer and lower the risk of men’s prostate cancer. Bam!

3.“Water helps regulate body temperature.” You know that coffee comes in iced AND a hot version right? Yeah. Consider yourself regulated.

2.”Water is good for kidney health.” How many kidneys do we have? 2 -How many brains do we have? 1 – Hello, Alzheimer’s studies finding special stuff in coffee that “boosts the levels of granulocyte colony stimulating factor (GCSF).” booyah. Yeah- I said booyah.

1. Water doesn’t make me as happy as coffee- and that’s the #1 reason it’s better. Done and Done.

http://healthcave.com/17-health-benefits-of-drinking-water/

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/10/31/coffee-health-benefits_n_1064577.html

http://www.mangosteen-natural-remedies.com/benefits-of-drinking-water.html

Top 10 for October 2012

Why you should not fear, but instead embrace packs of dogs. Yeah. You heard me. 

10.They are like patrolmen of the entire town. NOONE screws with dogs. 

9. They are far more effective then your finest neighborhood watch program. They know what's going on. They know if you should be in a particular area.....or if you shouldn't.

8. They discourage you from carrying food on your person, which is highly effective in one's weight loss plan.

7. They are Super Smart. Smarter than a lot of people I've met- They adhere to traffic guidelines, are for the most part respectful of others boundaries and are all around law-abiding community dwellers.

6. They encourage greater exertion during outdoor activity (i.e. running/walking) while in their general vicinity.

5. They fully understand that there is power in numbers.

4. They make our streets safer. Do you think these nutcases going 60MPH on scooters/cars down a side street are going to stop for children playing? Of course not. But for packs of dogs? Oh- they slow down. These dogs are like traffic cones. 

3. Waste not want not. Extra Food? Extra Anything? These dogs are all over it. Literally.

2.Packs of dogs increase one's awareness of their surroundings. It's easy to become complacent within one's environment. Seeing a pack of dogs in the distance is like a little wake up call, like..Oh. There's a pack of dogs. Hmm.

1. They teach you not to make snap judgements. While I wouldn't recommend reaching up and giving them a nuzzle, many mind their own business and are just doing their thing.... NOT necessarily looking at you as their next snack. Just sayin'

Top 10 for November 2011

You know you're becoming Taiwanese when.........

1. Your thumb moves involuntarily as if ringing a bell while walking, to have people move out of the way.

2. Stack that bike.....You become a master packer and can load a small living room set on your bicycle.

3. You can hold an umbrella and ride your bike at the same time.

4. When grocery shopping, if it doesn't fit in my bicycle basket or my two arms to walk home, it's unnecessary.

5. You wear a jacket in 70 degree weather and claim that it's a bit chilly outside.

6. A light spritzing of rain is comparable to a sunny day.

7. You buy produce and hanging meat from the market..on a side street.

8.You buy un-refridgerated eggs and don't think twice about it. (It really is no big deal)

9. You accept fireworks or a random parade in the median as commonplace and don't even bat an eyelash.

10. Start doing Tai Chi moves without thinking......

Top 10 for the week of September, 2011

So, this concept was a lot harder to execute than I had previously thought. I'm just not that clever. What I do need, however is a Top 10 bucket list for my stay here in Taiwan. To clarify, not before I kick the proverbial bucket in Taiwan, but things I want to do before we leave...like on a plane back to the U.S. kind of leave.......

1. Learn Mandarin

2. Speak Mandarin and actually have Taiwanese locals know what I'm saying.

3. Master Mahjong a favorite game here

4. Play Mahjong in the park with the older locals

5. Get rid of my 30+ experimental weight loss plan because I actually lose the weight.

6. Go sky diving by the beach

7. Get my snorkeling license

8. Master Tai Chi

9. Join the local women in the park to do Tai Chi once I know what I'm doing.

10. Climb/Hike a mountain....there's enough of them!!!

Top 10 for the week of February 6, 2011

 Why McDonald's should seriously look into re-vamping their Play-lands.
Picture this...Sicily 19 ....haha just kidding (for all of my Golden Girls fans who actually got that)... but humor me for a moment. In all my hours at McDonald's play-land I've had time to dream big.-Think fitness/SPA area for moms. Why?? Well, I'm so glad you asked.

10.The play-land caters as much to adults as it does to the kids.
9. Encourages interaction with other adults.
8. Minimizes the percentage of baby talking adults.... (See above-#9)
7. Decreases stress
6. Happier kids, because we ALL know the saying is true, if mamma ain't happy.....
5. Irony...less guilt if MC-D's food is actually being worked off after consumption.
4. Healthier Americans ..... ..(well that may be a stretch.......)
3. Increased social interaction amongst toddlers leading to healthier development of social and language skills.
2. A legitimate definition of happy hour. 
1. Please.....we all need a minute. This is just another "outlet" to get one.

Top 10 for the week of January 30, 2011

                     Why we should discard forks and eat everything on a stick.   
                     

10. No muss, No fuss.
9. It's incredibly portable.- You can truly carry it anywhere.
8. See food you like? Stick it and go. Stick it and go.
7. Cook it, roast it, boil it...all on the stick.- Ready to eat.
6. If you're really ambitious one stick can hold 3 well-balanced meals.- WHOA.
5. If someone gets frisky around your food- perhaps a little grabby...yup, you're catching on. Stick'em.
4. With sticks there is no need to be ambidextrous. This works well if you're especially hungry- double stick'n.
3. Food becomes more aesthetically pleasing on a stick...if of course you're one who's concerned with presentation.
2. Leftovers? No problem. On a stick it's just way less hassle.
1. Your kid cranky? Hand them a snack on a stick (see below).- Awesome.

Top 10 for the week of January 16, 2011

            Why scooters should be everyone's new mode of transportation

10. They're little, they're compact and they go a minimum of 200 mph.
9. People who drive scooters do not need to obey ordinary traffic laws. They make their own rules.
8. Great gas mileage.
7. Not only can you drive them on the street, but you can drive them on the sidewalk as well. How awesome is that?!?!?!
6. Fantastic color choices and the options for hello kitty helmets are endless (at least in Taiwan) (Be very jealous my American friends).
5. Maximum flexibility. Small space? No problem. Squeeze between two cars? No problem. Ride along the left hand side of a car because it will get me where I need to go 2 minutes faster? No problem.
4. The ever present thrill that you can get picked off by a car or a pedestrian because you just made up another " new rule."
3. No trunk? No problem! Scooters can carry a living room sized carpet with little effort.
2. No hassle of rolling down a window when going to a drive-thru. Think about the wind in your hair baby!!
1. Scooters can transport a family of four  (say it with me...) - no problem.